Tag Archives: free verse

February 27, 2021

My Mind, Fucked Up

By Rhonda

My mind is so fucked up.
I don’t know why I’m here.
What’s the point?
No one would miss me.
Why would they?

I don’t belong.
I’m worthless.
Just another body, a waste of space.
They say they’ll miss me.
All lies.

They make me laugh.
I know I’m just a burden.
Not worth the stress.
I’m self-destructive.
And I can’t be saved.

My mind is so fucked up.
The highs are uncomfortable.
The lows, unbearable.
I have no control.
Still, everything’s my fault.

I want so badly to love myself.
But I know I don’t deserve it.
And I don’t deserve your love either.
I deserve nothing.
I’m delusional.

These thoughts, these emotions…
They’re too much.
I’m frozen, in shock.
Yet somehow I’m screaming, pleading.
Please God, what is the meaning?

My mind is so fucked up.

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April 27, 2020

Nothing Makes Sense

By Rhonda

I am in love with you. You say you are in love with me too. You say you are. You say. You are.

Are you? Are you in love with me too? I want to believe that you are, but we just met. What the fuck? We just met.

How can we already be in love? That makes no sense. No fucking sense. Nothing makes sense though, so who cares if it doesn’t make sense. Right?

The moment I saw your face, I was drawn to you. I was in love. Before you even said hello, I knew I needed you. I was in love.

Either one of us could fall out of love at any moment. We don’t know each other. This could all be just a figment of our imaginations – my imagination. Not real love.

I don’t believe it though. I know we just met, but I don’t believe it. My feelings are real. Your feelings are real. This is real love. This has to be real love.

I’ve never felt anything like this. I think about you all the time. Constantly. Never again will I think about anything else. Even if I wanted to, my mind is stuck on you.

The moment I saw your face, my life was changed forever. I was in love. Before you even said hello, I knew my life depended on you. I was in love.

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April 27, 2020

Face First into the Pavement

By Rhonda

Today I got stoned and started thinking about you. No surprise there. You got me wrapped around your finger. I’m high on your validation. I can’t breathe when you sweet-talk me. If you said I love you, I’d say I love you too. Because I’m addicted to this high, and I know it’s not right, but it feels right. 

It shouldn’t feel right.

But it does.

So, here I am, thinking about you. Again. No matter what I do, I can’t stop thinking about you. Do you think about me too? I doubt it. Why would you think about me too? You don’t know me, I don’t know you. This is all just a figment of my imagination. But still, my feelings run deep, I can’t control them. My soul longs for you. How fucking pathetic is that?

I am fucking pathetic.

But you? You’re just having fun.

This is all just a game to you. You know better, you know to keep your feelings intact. You know we can’t be together, so you didn’t let yourself fall. Me on the other hand, I fucking fell face first and busted my mouth on the pavement.

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October 27, 2019

Unconditional Love

By Rhonda

She cries when he puts on his shoes, nuzzling her face into his chest.
He embraces her before he leaves.

She greets him at the door, throwing her body against his.
He holds her before taking off his coat.

She asks for a bite of his food, her eyes honing in on his plate.
He lets her have as much as she wants.

She sobs when he is in the bathroom, her head resting against the door.
He invites her to cuddle when he gets out.

She lies naked on the floor, her goodies out for the world to see.
He admires her beauty.

She leans over his thigh, her nose just a dick’s length away from his dick.
He rests his hand on her back.

She stands in the doorway, her eyes focusing on his face.
He smiles when he notices her.

She sprawls out in bed, her stomach pressing against his.
He silently stares into her eyes.

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